Mediocre

Be careful in your sleep

You might trip unexpectedly

And hurt your subconscious

Destroying its precious contents

Why be bored when you can be depressed?

Metamorphosis can be done

And undone

In the blink of an inner eye’s blink

I may

Satisfy

My own mind

With successions of anti-drama

Reloading screens of foggy unpleasant experiences

And hopes for lossless compression

For some new language of compassion

For deep connections,

Long forgotten,

Buried in harmonic equations of superficial provisions

Can men carry their own mistakes in heaven?

For hell be a place of consistency and no free will

I am still,

Amoureux

De Moi

That was a lie, in my own face

Reach out and tell the world we’re friends

Tell them we hang out on Saturdays

And Sundays

That we kiss under the full moon on a monthly basis

That we fuck every time we get a chance

Tell them you don’t want chaos anymore

This convoluted contour

It contains consistent shadows

Echoes, of many edgy blows

They sing, they belong in swift hell

My dear, Listen …

I try to be poetic, but instead …

I end up feeling halfway between problematic and pathetic

My existence is improvised,

I do my best to convey dead lost ideas

Only to end up imploding with mediocre monologues instead

Feelings I speculated, existed

Reality recycles its garbage again

I wish I hadn’t bled in vain

The promised absolution lane never came

Veni, Vidi, Vici, the man said under the rain

In his peak moment,

His inner ape felt triumphant

He felt powerful in a blue stain

What do apes objectively know?

Calculus?

They don’t even know their place in the universe

A little rock goes around a bigger plasma sphere

Unnoticed,

Yet, its occupants cheer

They celebrate their wins every year

Year follows another year

Well, me?

I find inner peace in just wanting to disappear

I was a dreamy star boy

Simple dreams led to complex dreams

I became a magician

One who could trick things into vanishing

And now?

I struggle to trick my own feelings to vanish

Don’t worry, I can manage

I lost myself somewhere, somehow

It doesn’t matter which way is up

Up is built-in to be felt,

As a win

The ape figures out that the electron spins

Still

No one notices

I was wondering what you really were

Unfiltered you

The real you

Do you have dimensions? Hidden chambers?

Are you bored?

Maybe you like to be called sweetheart in the morning

Do you get headaches when you sleep without a pillow?

Do you like to smoke your cigarette slow

Come on, show me your ideal flow

Blow after blow

Bring music to my ears, eyes to my tears

So I can reverse my speech

In any direction I please

Whisper sweet words

Word by word

Describe your rich inner world

Inspire me to draw my sword

Inspire me to catch blood

In my hands

Just like you did that evening

When I was leaving

When colors betrayed you

When I almost got to hug you

And then ended up betraying you